Lady Merlina
by Siblynika
Summary: Merlin reads some smudged words scrawled in the corner of his magic book. It has interesting results, to say the least.
1. Chapter 1

Merlin sat cross legged on his bed. Leaning over his magic book, he strained to read the tiny letters scrawled in the corner of the 'Transfiguration' page. "_fram adames __tó __Éfe ic béne sylfum __þé ðú __bæc __sé bizant ond andetta mec lóclóca hwa hit sy gelíc æt béon" _he finally managed to decipher the smudged letters. He then spoke the words out loud in a forceful manner. Nothing happened. Once more, he shouted out the words, not really out of a necessity for the spell. More or less, it was simple curiosity. A strange, pink glow surrounded the young warlock. As his head grew lighter and his vision blurred, he thought, just before he passed out was: "This is not going to end well".

"Merlin!" Gaius walked into his room, one hand balancing a large wicker basket on his hip, the other promptly returning from the door to the center of his back; he closed his eyes in pain. "Merlin!" he called again "I need you to fetch me some herbs for my back. I seem to have ran out of yarrow and willow bark" a high pitched scream came from Merlin's room. Running, well, _limping_ really, Gaius made his way to the bedroom. Swinging open the door, his eyes grew wide as a lean, _female _figure came into view, "**Merlin**?" The girl whirled around, her eyes just as wide, both hands clutched at each new breast

"Gaius, I have **breasts**" he…. She wailed

"I'm afraid that's not all you have" Gaius muttered. From the bedside table, she snatched up a tin plate and stared into the reflection

"My face still looks the same" Merlin dropped the plate and instead took to rubbing herself, starting at her new long, wavy hair and ending at her own rear end "My body is a girls'?"

"It seems whatever did this to you couldn't change you completely" Gaius sighed "That's good"

"Good?" Merlin frantically gestured to herself "_this_ is good?"

"This means it can be reversed in a fairly simple manner" he paused "Once we figure out what that simple way is, of course" Merlin glared at the elderly man

"Gaius, I can't be seen like this. I have duties, Arthur will have my head once I'm turned back and my pants are falling down!" the trousers that had previously fit the young man, were now falling off the slim hips of the woman and pooled around her ankles. Apparently, she had also shrunk a little bit but still maintained her previous selves' lankiness.

As if on cue, Guinevere walked in, "Gaius, Arthur asked me to find Merlin- why is Merlin a girl?" Gaius and Merlin looked at each other in shock, then at Gwen

"How did you know?" Merlin asked

"The ears- your ears kind of stick out… but not in an unattractive way!" she hurriedly added at girl Merlin's horrified expression, she looked on the verge of tears.

"Do you think anyone else will notice?" Merlin asked

"You better hope not" Gaius interjected "This mustn't get out in the open. Arthur has enough on his plate without worrying about a magical invasion. Now tell me what were you doing when this happened?" Merlin gave a shifty look towards Gwen

"Reading…. A book… and I fell asleep"

"Did you read anything out of this book… out loud?" Gwen looked utterly confused. With a guilty expression, Merlin looked at Gaius

"I may have read a few words, well, sentences you could say" Gaius slapped a palm to his forehead, not daring to say what he really wanted to say, due to Gwen's presence.

"MERLIN!" a booming male voice sounded from outside, followed by a severe pounding on the door, it shook in its frame.

"I'll take care of him" Gaius hastened to the door, "You get our new 'guest' properly dressed" Gwen nodded, taking Merlin by the arm and tugging her to the bedroom.

"I believe he was planning on spending the day at the tavern" Merlin heard Gaius say

"NO!"

First off, I would like to thank everyone who has or will ever review one of my stories. You may be few, but you are mighty! Secondly, yarrow and willow bark are in fact, two herbs commonly used to strengthen and relieve pain in muscles. The spell is in old English, a completely made up spell, but real words. However, this story has been sitting in my documents and I have since forgotten what it translates into exactly. My sincerest apologies, should I keep this story up, I will research and post it on the second chapter. Just wanted to let you know I do my research! Thank you for reading and please review. =)


	2. Chapter 2

Gwen had to run back to her own house for fabric and sewing supplies. Now returned, she had begun measuring Merlin's new body proportions. "This is humiliating" she, Merlin, muttered

"Don't be such a girl" Gwen laughed abruptly halting in mid chuckle in realization. Merlin craned her neck in order to properly glare "Sorry. But this is just a little funny"

"This isn't funny _at all_" Merlin snarled through gritted teeth. Gwen cleared her throat in a desperate attempt to halt the giggles ticking inside.

"If it makes you feel any better you are very attractive for having been a boy" she tried comforting Merlin. Merlin burst into tears. "I'm sorry!" Gwen patted Merlin's back awkwardly trying not to drop the pins she had in her grasp.

"It's not you" Merlin sniffled, hurriedly wiping at her eyes "It's just… I have all these feelings. They're- they're very strange. I feel like crying all the time"

"Your hormones must have kicked into overdrive in order to compensate for your original testosterone levels" Gaius had managed to persuade Arthur to leave and had now entered Merlin's bedroom.

"I'm a woman now, Gaius!" Merlin reprimanded his guardian "I could've been undressed!"

"I'm sorry, Merlin, but quite frankly you do not have much to hide" Merlin gasped

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?" she demanded, placing her hands on her hips, then yelped when she popped her hip out into one of Gwen's pins.

"I think I will go to the library and see what I can dig up on your condition" Gaius ignored Merlin's protests, "Gwen, explain to him- her- _Merlin_ what I mean" the white haired man hastened out, chuckling all the while.

"Is there something wrong with me?" Merlin asked Gwen, taking care not to move.

"Not wrong per se" Gwen admitted, not daring to look into her eyes "What Gaius meant was that your body type didn't change that dramatically in the transformation… you're still lean and-"

"What did he mean, Guinevere?" Merlin roared. Gwen cringed

"You're not exactly what one would consider well endowed" she reluctantly admitted. At Merlin's blank look, she continued "buxom? Full figured?" still blank. Finally she said "Merlin, your breasts are only slightly larger than a mosquito bite. Sir Percival has bigger ones than you" As she expected, Merlin burst into tears.

"I want perky breasts!" she sobbed "yours look so pretty and b-b-bouncy" Gwen sighed. She hadn't wanted to do this.

"Merlin, if I show you a way to get" she cringed "perky breasts, will you stop crying?" staring wide eyed back at her, Merlin nodded. Gwen pulled out a bodice. "Hold the girls up high and close together while I lace this up on you".

Gaius had not gone to the library. While he was in the bedroom, he had managed to grab the Magic book without Gwen noticing. He had found the script Merlin had read and was currently holding a magnifying glass up close to it. Merlin swung his bedroom door wide open. "How do you like them now?" she crowed, posing and sticking her chest out as far as she could without throwing her back out. Gwen stepped out from behind the now slightly more endowed woman.

"Gaius, it's been a long day" she began slowly, edging away from Merlin as she did so "If you don't need me for anything else, I should like to see Arthur before I retire for the night" Gaius nodded his permission, still staring at Merlin, trying to figure out what exactly had changed about her appearance, other than the addition of a dress.

"Just don't tell Arthur anything about" he jerked his head toward Merlin, who was still posing.

"I'm not sure he'd believe me even if I did" Gwen laughed nervously. "Tell her they look nice" she hissed in Gaius' ear before running from the room.

"Merlin, we have a serious problem here" Gaius hobbled to the girl, cursing in his mind that he hadn't asked Gwen to pick those herbs for him before she departed. Instantly, Merlin sobered.

"Can you change me back?" she asked "As nice as I look, I don't really want to be a girl for the rest of my life"

"I'm afraid all the book said was that the spell needs to run its course. And I'm not even sure what that mean exactly."

"Great. Just great" Merlin stared at the stone floor. She sighed, loudly. "I need a drink" she declared and began to leave

"Where do you think you think you're going?" Gaius hollered after the retreating figure.

"To the tavern since that's where you said I'd be anyway!" Merlin retorted.

It's now 1230 in the morning where I'm at. Since I'm leaving in two days to go home for a visit, I thought I'd post a chapter or two. Thank you to the three who reviewed so quickly after I uploaded the first chapter: Angelwahalla and Spazwahalla, Galaya, and EJPhineasIII.

I am also taking suggestions for new titles (I despise the one I have right now. However, my computer was dying as I was posting so I typed the first thing that came to mind).


	3. Chapter 3

My apologies for the long wait, lovies, I had a bunch of family crap to deal with. I'll try to do better in the future. Anyway, if you have **NOT **seen Episode 2 of this season, there **IS **a spoiler. You have been warned.

Thank you, Crystal1998 and Tagrea for reviewing the last chapter =)

As usual, I don't own anything… except my Merlin plushie...

Enjoy!

After a long day of training with King Arthur, it was nice to simply kick back with a drink and scope out the tavern wenches. Which was precisely what Sir Gwaine was doing, along with Leon who insisted he was only there to make sure he didn't make the Knights of Camelot look the fool; Percival and Elyan were there as well. Percival currently had the serving wench, Beth, practically bending over backwards to his every whim. Gwaine wasn't quite sure how he, Percival, managed to get all the ladies. Did they really find sleeveless chainmail that attractive? This was why he preferred to go to the tavern on his own. Sure, he enjoyed the company of his fellow knights but sometimes he yearned for more feminine company. Too bad Lancealot wasn't around anymore. Gwaine cringed at his own thoughts, taking a swig of his ale to remove any trace of it. Thinking ill of the dead, he really must be lonelier than he thought. That's when he saw her.

In the opposite corner sat a young woman, alone, not daring to look any one in the eye instead she stared intently at her own pints contents. Gwaine began to make his way over, casually, looking the girl up and down. She certainly wasn't anything special by a long shot. However, when a lady obviously has put effort into making herself look more endowed, it would be rude _not _to say something. Having thoroughly convinced himself of his duty, Gwaine slid into the seat across from the girl. She didn't make eye contact.

"_Don't say anything and he'll go away_" Merlin repeated to herself. She could practically feel Gwaine's eyes burning a hold into her skull.

"What's a lovely young maiden doing in such a rough place all by her lonesome?" Merlin almost snorted. How **did **he get girls? "I should let you know, I am a Knight of Camelot and it would be my honor to defend **your **honor for the evening. For a price, of course; a name, perhaps?" Gwaine persisted. It was obvious that Merlin needed a new plan. Was it hot in here? She could feel her palms sweating.

"Merrr- " Merlin stopped. Why was her throat so tight all of a sudden? "Myrddin!" she managed to squeak out. Did she honestly just squeak? Why were her body and mouth not cooperating with her? Gwaine was smirking. He looked so dreamy….

Merlin mentally slapped herself. _Dreamy? _Well he did…. "_**focus**_**" **she scolded. _Just concentrate on not making a bigger fool of yourself…. It's just Gwaine. _

_Gwaine who I've seen shirtless. _

_As a MAN. _

_Yes, he is, isn't he?_

Gwaine was beginning to feel uncomfortable. This girl was rocking back and forth and seemed to be **arguing** under her breath. Perhaps she was more trouble than she was worth?

Beth's high pitched giggle rang across the room. She all but had her skirts over Percival's head. Disgusting… Lucky bastard. No, he had to follow this through. He could deal with crazy… for a night anyway. With a new found resolve, Gwaine pressed forward.

"A beautiful name for a beautiful maiden" She had nice eyes. He'd let them be his driving force. Now that he had made eye contact, Gwaine was able to closer inspect 'Myrddin'. Those eyes looked so familiar. He chose to ignore the eerie familiarity and instead moved next to the girl, noticing smugly that the other knights had now diverted their attention from Percival's new headdress to himself. He'd show them. Percival had nothing on him

"Where are you from? I think I would have noticed such a beauty if you lived in Camelot." Gwaine smirked as Myrddin stuttered for an answer. It was almost too easy.

"I'm not!" she gasped. "I'm just-passing through. Just here for a visit. Not here for long" she finally managed to stammer out a half coherent statement.

"Just a visit?" Gwaine sidled closer. "Perhaps I could direct you to comfortable lodging?" He took her hand and gently caressed her fingers. A nail biter, how charming, he grimaced inwardly, careful to keep his facial expression pleasant.

"That won't be necessary. I'm staying with friends" her voice had such an irritating pitch…

"I could be your friend" Gwaine swooped in for the kill. He tilted her chin up and began to lower his lips to her own.

"Gwaine, it's me!" Merlin frantically groped around for something, anything, reflective, realizing that if she allowed Gwaine to do this, she would never be able to look at him the same once she was back to normal. Desperate, Merlin grabbed a tin plate from the table behind the two and gestured to her own reflection. "It's Merlin" Gwaine recoiled faster than if he'd been slapped.

"Come again?" he whispered hoarsely, glancing quickly over at the knights' table. They didn't appear to notice anything unusual. "Are you serious?" Merlin nodded

"I woke up like this. Only Gaius and Gwen know"

"Does Arthur know?"

"Did you not hear what I just said?" Merlin rolled her eyes. Her sweaty palms and squeaky voice were completely gone now, much to her relief. She would have to remember to ask Gwen about that. "Obviously he doesn't and you're not going to tell him either" Gwaine stood up forcefully, moving the table several inches as he did so.

"Merlin" he began slowly "you are one of my closest…. Actually, one of my only friends if you want to get technical, but I have to disagree with you on this; Arthur is the king now, if there's sorcery going on in Camelot, he has the need to know". Gwaine had barely taken a step when Merlin muttered, just loud enough for him to hear:

"I wouldn't do that if I were you"

"And _why_ is that?" Gwaine asked, irritated

"Because if you do **that** then I might have to do **this**:" In one fluid moment Merlin had leapt from her seat, flung her spindly arms about the knight's neck, and kissed him. The entire tavern erupted in thunderous applause, they knights gave out several hoots of approval. Just as quickly as it occurred, it ended, leaving Gwaine sputtering and Merlin with a very Morgana like smirk on her face.

"If you tell Arthur, he **will** tell the knights about my _condition_. That leaves you with only two choices: Either you can live with them tormenting you until your last, dying breath _or" _Merlin fluttered her eyelashes mockingly "we can go for a little stroll and have a nice, little chat. You leave with your dignity and no one will be the wiser" Gwaine stared.

"You're the devil" he snarled. He roughly grabbed her wrist and walked toward the exit "Fine, I'll play along but I get to tell everyone that you're a regular scarlet woman that let me ride you like a two bit donkey"

"You can hold my hand and walk me home"

"This isn't negotiable"

"It is when you're the one with the black mail"

"Done" the two of them then departed the tavern. They hadn't gone but a few yards when none other than Arthur himself came strolling down the street.

"Evening, Gwaine, M'Lady" he gave Merlin a polite bow, much to her amusement, she burst into gales of hysterical, squeaky giggles. Arthur gaped at the woman who was practically falling onto the ground in her laughter. Gwaine tried not to look either one of them in the eye, instead choosing to pray for a quick and painless end.

"I do believe your… _friend_ may have had a little too much mead." Arthur strained to keep his tone pleasant and non-judgemental, Gwaine wasn't known to have the best taste in the ladies; not since Percival joined up now that he thought about it… he was sure there was no connection.

"Yes, yes hee-she has" Gwaine caught himself just in time, "I was just escorting the young lady home safely"

"I'm sure you were" Arthur replied dryly. "Have a good night then, Gwaine… M'Lady"

Gwaine hauled Merlin to her feet as soon as Arthur passed the pair, she was still giggling.

"Gwaine, before you take off" Arthur turned back around to stare at the couple "Did you see Merlin at the tavern by chance?" At the mention of her name, Merlin immediately sobered up, she looked pleadingly at Gwaine had a malicious smile on his face.

"I did in fact" he began, noticing with glee the look of absolute terror on Merlin's face "He was leaving just as I arrived myself. He was stumbling and falling all over himself like a fool. Said something about proposing to Gwen too" Merlin gawped at Gwaine, knowing that she was helpless to defend her- himself in that case- without giving away her identity.

"Is he still there?" Arthur had asked this with a straight face but the outer edge of his eyebrow was twitching, a dead giveaway that he was in fact, attempting to maintain control of his temper, something Merlin had picked up on fairly early on in their friendship.

"No, of course not" Gwaine was still grinning broadly "He's probably gone home to sleep it off by now, he looked pretty drunk" Arthur groaned.

"Well, that's just great. Why is good help so hard to find these days?" without a departing word, Arthur stormed off. Once he was safely out of sight, Merlin whirled on Gwaine, eyes full of fire.

"Prat" she growled, slapping him on the back of the head.

"Sticks and stones, love" Gwaine smirked. "Now come on, darling, we must get you to bed before you go propose to Gwen"

"I hate you so very much"


End file.
